Ending Domestic and Sexual Abuse in Mississippi

by Susan Naron

Counselor for S.A.F.E., Inc.

Times are changing and technology is advancing.  Because of this, our personal information is more readily available to anyone and everyone. The internet and cell phones are wonderful; however, they can be misused.  People experiencing domestic violence, stalking or violent relationships should be extra alert because abusers can use information provided by technology to do harm without the victim’s knowledge. Listed below are some helpful suggestions to increase your safety.

Technology Tips:

• Find out what is currently on the web about you.  Suggested websites to start your search are:  Google, Yahoo, YouTube, and Flickr.  Also, look on websites for groups and places where you might have a connection:  schools, clubs, jobs, churches, sports teams, and community groups.
• If you find something on the internet and would like your information to be removed, there are usually instructions on the website or an e-mail address provided where you can contact the website about your concern and or request.  If it’s a government record: a petition, motion, or letter may be required.
• Set your profile on social networking sites to private.  If you don’t, anyone can see your personal information.
• When signing up for a free email account, blog, or instant messaging; only provide the service with limited information.  Sometimes these services will post or list your information in public directories for anyone to see and access.
• Be cautious when stores ask you personal information.  The store might later sell your phone number or zip code information to a data broker who will then post it in an online directory.
• If you suspect that someone might be accessing any of your accounts, go to a computer that this person does not have access to and change your passwords.  Then, only check that account from a computer this person cannot access.  This holds true for your email or instant messages too.
• It is always wise to keep your passwords secret and change them often.  Passwords that have numbers, letters, and are at least 8 characters long are the best.
• If you are receiving text messages or phone calls from an unwanted person, talk to your phone service provider about blocking them or changing your number.

Stalkers and abusers use technology in harmful ways.  Just by typing in “spy on girlfriend” into a search engine, a multitude of listings will appear advertising easy to use Spyware programs.  By doing so, they can monitor their target’s e-mail and social networking sites.  If they become angry, stalkers can log in under their targets name and pretend to be them.  This can be used to spread lies to damage their targets reputation or even their employment status.  Spyware can also provide predator’s access to back accounts which will give them an opportunity to steal or falsify documentation.  Worst of all, if a victim is attempting to escape abuse or end the relationship, technology can be used to pinpoint a victim’s exact location.  For example, they can place a tracking device into a cell phone so they can monitor where their target is at any given time.

Mississippi has strengthened it laws regarding stalking (statute 97-3-107) and cyber-stalking (statute 97-45-15).  If you would like more information about your rights or are currently a victim of stalking, please go to www.agjimhood.com or contact S.A.F.E., Inc. at 1-800-527-7233.

Five Things You Don’t Know About Stalking

For many people “stalking” is a word that is heard on television, movies, in popular song and in casual conversation. Although it may seem like a joke or a harmless show of devotion, it is not.  Stalking is a crime in all 50 states. The National Center for Victims of Crime defines stalking as “a course of conduct directed at a specific person that would cause a reasonable person to feel fear.” and estimates 3.4 million American stalking victims every year!

Here are five things you probably don’t know, but should know about stalking:

1. You don’t have to be famous. Stalking is not primarily about a rabid fan following a celebrity as it is often portrayed in the media. Only 10% of stalkers are strangers to their victims. The other 90% are people the victim knows, with 30% being a former intimate partner.

1. It’s not a “one-time thing”. Many people who use stalking to scare and control someone have done this before.  Between 10-15% of victims are stalked for 5 years or more. Most reported stalking occurs several times a day and typical stalker uses a variety of methods to contact their victim.

1. It’s really dangerous! 89% of female murder victims that were physically abused by their killer were also stalked by that killer.  54% of those victims reported the stalking to the police before their death.

1. Being stalked can cause long-term problems. The stress and anxiety of being a victim of this type of crime can affect a person’s lifestyle, self-esteem, ability to be employed. Many victims have to move, quit their jobs and seek counseling on a continuing basis.

1. It’s not your fault. If you or someone you know is being stalked, the person committing the crime is the stalker, not the victim. If you need more information on stalking you can visit www.stalkingawarenessmonth.org and download their stalking fact sheet. If you need help obtaining a domestic abuse protective order or just need someone to talk with you about your options call the S.A.F.E., Inc. 24 Hour Crisis Line 1-800-527-7233.